Natives of LA love to complain about it: the pollution, the superficial, fastpaced lifestyle, the total lack of history and culture. These people live in LA for business, purely practical reasons, and once out of it they’ll move elsewhere: a calm and gentle place, a place with museums and opera houses, a place where everyone isn’t chasing their first million, a place where people have some spiritual and emotional sense, a place with people whose IQs don’t equal their weight in pounds. A place like San Francisco. It’s hard to live and survive in the movie business without being one of these types, and if you’re in LA you’re in it for the movies. That was certainly the reason I’d come to LA Not the films themselves perhaps, I could see them anywhere, but the movie culture: the stars, the sets, the general milieu. LA is the movie Mecca, the place where the deals are made, the pictures are shot, the stars are born. LA doesn’t have its own Empire State building; it doesn’t have the White House or Golden Gate Bridge. It doesn’t have Aspen mountains or Mississippi rivers. But LA has one thing unlike anywhere else on earth: more movie stars per square metre than every other place in the world. And those were the people I was there to see. Unfortunately I hadn’t arrived during Oscar season. It turned out the tickets were far too expensive and hotel prices (even hostels) were in the stratosphere. I guessed every movie geek in America made pilgrimage to Mecca at this time. So I arrived in winter, still sure that there would be enough movie stars wondering around the streets to satisfy my blood-lust. I booked into a hostel as close to the centre as I could afford. I’d heard that no one walks around the sprawling metropolis that is LA and the public transport system is nonexistent; and since I needed to be where all the action was (surprisingly there aren’t any hostels in Beverly Hills) I settled in Santa Monica, the next port of call for rich and famous. I’d prepared my trip like a paparazzo professional. After months of studying Hello!and Heat, I knew all the hangouts of the stars. I knew the glitzy vegan restaurant that fed Gwynnie and Madge, the nightclub where J-Lo liked to shake her booty. All these places had been filed in my memory and locations mapped out before I even arrived. I woke up bright and early on my first morning, rising with the LA sun and donning my jogging gear from a trip to Venice beach. Of course I had no intention of doing any exercise (being an Oxford student and not an LA starlet) but I knew that Johnny Depp took his morning excursion at said beach and I was going to witness it. Depp must be the sexiest creature in show business and probably the only thing that could get me out of bed at 6 am. So there I was, decked out in lycra, the fattest sight in a fifty mile radius, waiting for a glimpse of the high–cheekboned Adonis to rush past me. I waited and waited, my exposed parts slowly burning in the LA sun, and waited and waited. By the end of the morning I’d seen someone who closely resembled Luke Perry from 90210, an extra I remembered from an episode of Nash Bridges, and a dog-walker who I was pretty sure must have had a number of famous people’s dogs in his clutch. Such was my disappointment that I debated whether or not to follow the dog-walker back to his clients’ houses, in the hope that I might catch sight of Britney Spears or Brad Pitt. But I was in no fit state to encounter any of my idols. If there was anything worse than not meeting Brad Pitt, it would be meeting him while I closely resembled Edwina from Ab Fab. That being the case, I trekked back to my hostel to gather my wits, slather myself with sunblock and begin again. The next stop was The Viper Room, death place of River Phoenix and, I’d been reliably informed, the place to be for the young celebrity about town. This time I wore my hippest clubbing gear. I wasn’t deluded enough to think I could actually get in the club but I needed to blend in along Sunset Strip. As it was I blended in very well, spending the entire evening in an alleyway holding the arm of some filthy rich, desperately drunken teenager while she vomited the entire no-carb contents of her stomach all over my fake Manolos. Not quite the Hollywood experience I expected. A week later and the situation hadn’t improved. I’d covered half the square footage of LA and still any and every remotely famous person had eluded my grasp. I had images of Gorgeous George leaving eateries a few seconds after I’d entered them, of Winona Ryder dashing out of department stores before I’d had a chance to clock her, of Cruise and Cruz engaged in a kiss and make-up snogging session only a few feet away from me at any given time. I’d taken to nipping around street corners in the hopes of catching them unawares, of looking at the world through binoculars so I wouldn’t miss a thing. I’d even begun to follow the dog–walkers’ home. Unfortunately, despite my most concerted efforts, the situation didn’t improve. Two weeks in LA and the only remotely famous person I saw was the fat bloke from The Full Monty. A bloody Brit. I probably could have seen him down Camden Market. I packed my bags and headed for San Francisco. Maybe I’d bump into Britney in Maccy D’s.ARCHIVE: 3rd week TT 2004
Advertisement Rio Ferdinand certain Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang has made decision on Arsenal future Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang scored both goals in Arsenal’s FA Cup final win over Chelsea (Picture: Getty)Rio Ferdinand believes Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang has already decided to leave Arsenal, despite his FA Cup final winning heroics. The Gabon international has entered the final year of his contract and negotiations over a new deal have failed to progress leaving the Gunners exposed to the possibility of losing their captain for nothing in under 12 months’ time. Aubameyang underlined his importance to the club with both goals against Chelsea as Arsenal claimed the trophy for the 14th time in their history.The former Borussia Dortmund star refused to elaborate on his future in the immediate aftermath of a victory that secured Europa League qualification for the Gunners but former Manchester United star Ferdinand believes the prolific striker has already made up his mind to depart. AdvertisementAdvertisementADVERTISEMENTResponding to Aubameyang’s post match interview, Ferdinand told BT Sport: ‘That to me says he’s gone. I just feel like either there’s been no negotiation up until now which I don’t believe. Comment ð 1930ð 1936ð 1950ð 1971ð 1979ð 1993ð 1998ð 2002ð 2003ð 2005ð 2014ð 2015ð 2017ð 2020Always. Forward. ð´ pic.twitter.com/J7KxYk8J6m— ð Arsenal (@Arsenal) August 1, 2020 Metro Sport ReporterSaturday 1 Aug 2020 8:00 pmShare this article via facebookShare this article via twitterShare this article via messengerShare this with Share this article via emailShare this article via flipboardCopy link615Shares Advertisement ‘I feel there have definitely been negotiations or he’s already decided I’m going to go. ‘I’m going to enjoy this moment with my team-mates and I don’t want to talk about my future.More: Arsenal FCArsenal flop Denis Suarez delivers verdict on Thomas Partey and Lucas Torreira movesThomas Partey debut? Ian Wright picks his Arsenal starting XI vs Manchester CityArsene Wenger explains why Mikel Arteta is ‘lucky’ to be managing Arsenal‘From my own perspective if I’m committed to the club and I know I’m staying this is a moment for me to say I’m going to sort it out it’s not done yet but I will try and get it sorted out here guys.‘That just sounds like someone who is looking to go elsewhere. Arsenal need to do all they can to get this guy to stay.’MORE: Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang speaks out on his Arsenal future after FA Cup final heroicsMORE: Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang inspires Arsenal FA Cup win over ChelseaFollow Metro Sport across our social channels, on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.For more stories like this, check our sport page.